Oh Snap!

The last post of 2009.

Well kids, it's been a tough year, but we've made it through anyhow. I'd like to thank this time to say thank you to all of the folks who stop by this site and hang for a while. I appreciate you. Hopefully 2010 will be awesome, but I ain't gonna put my hopes in the air just yet. I'm not making any resolutions either. Screw it... I drink, I smoke, I touch myself. That's who I am and it's what my daddy made me. I'm kidding. I was made in a lab.

Anyway, I hope to see all the old faces on January 2nd 2010. I'm giving an extra day because if you're gonna go out celebratin' the new year, you better do it so well that you spend the first day of it vomiting. That being said, I hope I see some new and friendly faces too.

And hopefully I speak for a lot of bloggers out there...

... may 2010 be a year where leaving nice meaningful and relevant comments is the norm.

(To the four people who just discovered the internet: Copy/ paste to translate)

I am a person who is full of love:

Love for my family.

Love for music.

Love for my Department.

Shit, I love you too and I'll tell you this:

I draw when I drink, I drink when I draw... tell the cops whatever, except what you saw.

The Plague Whore of Mell County

The Atlantic City Witch

Shark

Bedroom Spider Dealer

Busstop

Belaware and the Wish

Fervent

Those Two

Blown Ghosts

Dog Day For Passion

The Pink Robot Behind Me

Hell Wants

Hell Gets

Gunggung Baby

Horrible Things Under Your Bed

Texas Road Trip

Idea

Poor Sport

Chewn

I'll see you when you're sleeping

Happy New Year!!!

The Teacher is serious business!

You can lie and say you're not aroused. It's cool.

Os Mutantes will supply the head.

http://sharebee.com/e4bec8e4

Click here for a salt and pepper smoothie.

The debut album from Brazil's Os Mutantes is good for one thing. Spend a quiet night alone with it and you'll see what I mean. By the way, have a nice trip.

y-y-y-y-YIKES!

http://sharebee.com/e33384a3

Click here for Ed Koch hairspray

There is definitely something about John Dwyer that rocks my socks off. Besides the sixteen hundred bands he's in, he's also in this one.

Go to all of his shows. Buy his vinyl too, because he always makes it in really pretty colors.

Please enjoy Yikes! Whoa comas or blood bomb.

I don't know a damned thing about sports.

For a little while now, this blog has been my dumping ground for basically whatever I feel like dumping. I'm excited about it. I hope you are too. D2.

Instead of a Star Wars reference, please enjoy this video. It's an oldie, but somehow it has always retained its elegance. I'm debating as to whether or not I'm going to get up and fix myself a cocktail. Tonight's weapon of choice will be Gin and Ginger Ale. I cannot fail. Now press play and enjoy something for once in your goddamned life Cutie pie!!

Unintentional rapping not withstanding*

Detroit Cobras learned all of this... man!

http://www.mediafire.com/?hijynazq2xy

Click here to imitate Yakov Smirnoff forever.

Sure, everyone knows how rad the Detroit Cobras are, but do you know how great the original tunes were? Probably not and now you will.

I would include a track list here, but this evening I am far too preoccupied to get into all that. However, my digital kinfolk, Dgrador had this a while back and he has the songs listed there. He's a good dude.

Hey, do you know who Yakov Smirnoff even is?

NSFW, but pretty cool.

NSFW means "not safe for work" just in case you're like... new to the internet and if that's the case... well, welcome aboard!

I'm not sure what it is about the work of Laurent Jourquin that catches my eye, but I'm guessing that it has something to do with the fact that there is nudity involved or at the very least, cardboard. I love cardboard. That's right. Cardboard.

The times, they are a changin'

http://sharebee.com/ce01305d

Click here for one ukulele tattoo

In 1964 Bob Dylan released this record. If you aren't a fan, then this album sounds like his 3000 other ones. If you are a fan... well, this album sounds just like his 3000 other ones. (Accurate)

That ain't a bad thing.

When I hear this record I imagine laying on the hood of a truck beneath a moonlit sky somewhere in the midwest. There would be an empty bottle of whiskey on the ground near the front tire. Don't feel sad because it's empty... I've got a flask.

The good things: Part 2

If you know what this is and you saw it when it first came out... I'm certain that you felt pretty good on that very day. This happens to be my favorite fIREHOSE song as well.

Maniac Cop is serious business! But really he just wants to wish you a Merry Christmas.

My first Christmas Card!

Thanks Lisa! Tell the boys I hope they all get a little more than coal this year. Also, I have no phone right now. The devil ate it :(

*Update 12/26/09: Correction-my only Christmas card.

This is Sic.

http://sharebee.com/6d2edd06

Click here for the sausage drink.

Thank God San Francisco exists because, like Memphis, I'd be fucked for awesome bands without it. Thank you Earth for not exploding.

... and this is yet another band Ty Segall is involved with. I barely have the drive to put mayo on a ham sandwich. Damn...

Compulsive Gamblers - Bluff City

http://sharebee.com/c3a8ce84

Click here for KRS one hand soap

Well, would' ya look here... it's almost Christmas again. It's that special time of the year where all the little kids in the world are being extra good and practicin' their manners the best they can. It's a time where families come together... unless we're talking about my family. I haven't spoken to them in years. There are only a handful of us alive. It's alright though... we ain't got nothin' in common anyway.

Christmas is good. Don't forget that. I ain't forgettin' to be kind and giving to my digital kinfolk, that's for sure.

Please enjoy Bluff City because Greg Cartwright is a gift to music.

Pleasurable viewing.

Mazzy Star - Flowers in December...

Bob Dylan - A man of constant sorrow...

Dan John Miller - Superstition (acoustic)....

Skeeter Davis - The end of the world...

All I want for Christmas...

...is a thousand pairs of these. In all the colors of Roy G. Biv

More twee: The Postmarks

http://sharebee.com/4ddea655

Click here for mandolin balm

Pompano Beach, Florida. Nothing comes from there. Nothing except The Postmarks and... this guy

Enjoy!

Recommended if you enjoy Camera Obscura and the lot.

The Ditty Bops.

http://sharebee.com/1383cdcf

Click here for a free Taliban space hat

I came to know about this band one night when I went to see Blanche perform at Spaceland or one of those LA venues I barely ever make it to. Oddly enough, Blanche, who I think are one of the greatest bands alive, were the opening act. No complaints here. I got to see them early.

After a forty or so minute set, Blanche packed up their gear and cleared the stage for the Ditty Bops. Fifteen minutes later the band began making their way up to the stage and began setting up.

They were cool and their music had a real old timey feel. I ended up walking out with their album.

The weirdest thing about that night is pretty much as soon as Blanche packed the last of their things, the room emptied out substantially and suddenly, the room became predominantly filled with a lot of girls. A. lot. of. ladies.

No more than four other guys in the whole place.

Random fact: These two are married.

Young People

http://sharebee.com/364e517b

Click here for washboard flabs

A while back I posted their second album, War Prayers, and today I'm offering their first. There isn't anything groundbreaking going on, but it's one of those records that I just have to hear every once in a while.

Katie Eastburn and the boys straddle the fence between avant garde noise and straight forward indie rock, but their shining moment on this self titled record is called "Ne'er do well" Trust me. It's oddly catchy.

Random fact: This bands drummer, Jeff Rosenberg, was in Pink and Brown with John Dwyer of Coachwhips/ Thee Oh Sees fame.

Evil. A study of bad men. #1.

An impressive smell wafted through the room. It was a literature buff's wet dream . A small nation of bookshelves carefully crafted together before you or I were born. The old, important books and their leathered scent were the 300 pound gorilla in the room. It was his haven. The old man was like a timed geyser the way he headed into his office each evening, but to those outside its walls it was more like a library with its dark wood and dim lighting.

Outside of those walls, his life, a circus beneath the exaggerated glow of the ever present public with their peering eyes melting holes in his arrival. Fortunately, it didn't matter because he was the boss. His father, a 1930's businessman at the height of a new real estate boom, died young and left Mr. Charles Thorpe his life long earnings. It's rumored that Thorpe's winnings totaled up somewhere near the high millions. He had an empire. He was the type of man who would support a politician and in the same evening, take liberties with an easy woman he'd encountered at the seediest of dives where no respectable lowlife would lay his hat. An odd fellow to say the least, but Charlie, as they called him, was taught how to turn a dollar quite young. That's why it was so weird to see him being led away in cuffs.

Nobody would have ever thought that old Charlie would ever have committed murder. It wasn't just any murder. No, it was far more heinous than anything that you or I could come up with. There was so much blood it filled the cups in the cabinets. It wasn't just the endless amounts of blood that made the detectives sick, it was the smell wafting out of his hot warehouse office. It had the stench of old, rotting death. He spent a lot of time there. Alone. Reading.

The first girl he killed was named Sarah Cafferty. She was a student from Knoxville, Tennessee. She was in New York for a semester and ended up finding some work as a model. The police said that the skin of her chest was pulled off. Not in pieces, but like a sheet. As if that wasn't enough, she was found missing both hands and her tongue. That was twenty years ago...

Most recently the police found fourteen bodies buried alongside the building in various stages of decomposition.

... to be continued.

The Epsilons

http://sharebee.com/3a9eef28

Click here or get the gas face

If Ty segall were a girl, he'd be the hottest new model to grace the magazine covers. Since this is rock n' roll... he just puts out a lot of real cool records and probably bangs models.

Dexter

"Rita's dead??!!"

"Ay dios mio... tell me you're lying."

Familiarity: A little light shed.

To the readers of this blog who stop by on a regular basis: Thanks. I could surely do this without you, but your presence makes it better, that's for sure.

I figured that I'd say something completely true every once in a while. Here's my first... or 300th depending how long you've been around.

My mother, Carmen, was a prostitute. Don't be sad. It's fine. She slept with many men as would her job have demanded... but, there was one gentleman, probably in the long line of many that she bedded, that would indicate she wasn't a total bottom feeder...

she slept with Robert Zimmerman a.k.a. Bob Dylan. Sure... a tall tale some might say, but rest assured... it is true. It isn't a badge by any means. It's just a nice thing to hear as opposed to hearing that your mom gave headies to truck drivers at Virginian rest stops. I say this because she wasn't just a one time thing. There is history there. Maybe it was just sex... who knows? I'll have to find a genie to wish for one opportunity to ask Dylan himself. That's all for now. Have a nice day and an even better evening.

On the tap, in the can, or from the bottle...

Play this without smiling and I'll have no choice but to deem you an asshole. This is fun!

DrunknPuke

This is pretty.

Violent Femmes.

http://sharebee.com/dd2e789c

Click here to see the leering O'Doul

Here is another record that is crucial to any collection.

The only thing I think of when I hear this album is my old pal Benny. That guy would wake up at 6:00 AM, blast this record, and eat waffles while riding a skateboard through his house.

He is the exact opposite of another old pal of mine who hit his mother with a hammer. Trust when I say it wasn't just a light tapping.

I can't shut these damn things up! Pants Yell.

http://sharebee.com/4223297a
Click here for kinder moments

Yes they have a silly name.

Yes they are some of the most gentle boys you've ever heard.
Yes you should buy their new album.

Yes they make delicious lo-fi bedroom pop.

Yes I wrote the word delicious and now I'm going to be sick on my shoes.

I hate the word essential, but...

http://sharebee.com/be065039
Click here for lint practice

Santo and Johnny. Two brothers from Brooklyn. See? It wasn't always such a dancey ass town.

Everybody knows their song "sleepwalk" and I doubt that there's a person in existence who doesn't feel that song is perfect.

You should have this in your collection because there will always be a moment that you'll need it.

*This isn't the cover, but would you look at those two...

Video of the right now!

Nina Simone

http://sharebee.com/6027bc2f

Click here for kept up appearances

I leaned about Nina Simone when I was pretty young. I was working in a video store that only carried foreign films and I spent most of my days watching and recommending movies to people who almost exclusively wore little round glasses and thin, little pinky rings.

My boss at the time, a little Spanish old man that looked like the old version of

was friends with a guy that could be described closest by showing you a picture of

They were lovers. They were longtime companions. Although they tried to pretend that they just gave off a "European, hip intellectual" vibe, they instead came off as two old gay dudes that looked silly trying to conceal who they were. They were nice guys to work for.

Anyway, the Race Bannon looking one kept trying to "culture" me with music from his personal collection. Contently listening to punk rock was keeping me pretty occupied, but I figured I'd humor the guy and check it out.

Wow!

To make a long story short... I was fired a few days later after the Dos Equis guy did something stupid and I let him know I disagreed in such a way that it became the exact opposite of any possible outcome his heart desired. I pretty much left town after that. I ended up keeping this album.

Please enjoy the fabulous Nina Simone with

"I put a spell on you: The concert recordings."

PS. She hated rap music.

Mississippi John Hurt

http://sharebee.com/94b466ac

Click here for shared straw spit.

Everybody has their favorite blues guy. Some folks like a mean and gruff sounding screamer while others enjoy those honey sweet voices that seem to replicate morning sunbeams shining through the dirty glass windows of a mountain cabin. I am both types of people when it comes to the blues.

Mississippi John Hurt is the complete opposite of let's say... Son House. To quote a comment I read on somebody's Youtube page "His voice is so clean and clear that you could drink it."

Honestly, I couldn't agree more if there were two guys in my house pointing guns in my face, holding my family captive, and running my hot water until it ran cold.

Please enjoy Avalon Blues: The complete* 1928 Okeh recordings.


* For some reason, the 13th track "Spike Driver Blues" wouldn't transfer after multiple tries. Happy hunting elsewhere if you want it. Sorry.

Stay Down!!!!

Fresh & Onlys and me.

I 'd like to start off this post by giving a great, big thank you to Tim Cohen of San Francisco dark psyche purveyors of garage gloom; The Fresh & Onlys. I had the chance to meet him and guitarist Wymond Miles earlier tonight at this place called the 5 Stars Bar in downtown LA. They were there sharing the bill with the Tijuana Tigers, Cobalt Cranes, and Woven Bones for only eight bucks! It was like a dream come true except...

...I never got to see any of those bands play. I originally thought the F&Os were going to play at 8PM as their myspace indicated, but as it turned out, they were the last ones to play somewhere in the neighborhood of 12:30AM. I was then faced with a difficult decision...

... go in, have a bunch of drinks , see some rad bands, and buy a couple of records, but not have any clue as to how I was gonna get home because the train was going to stop running at the same time the F&Os were going on - or - play it safe and respectfully bow out of what can only be described as an awesome night ahead?

Los Angeles Metro... if you're listening... can you please start running your trains on a 24 hour schedule from now on? Because of your shitty hours, I probably missed the greatest show of the year.

I ended up deciding to turn around and regretfully go home. Then, all of a sudden, a large, white SUV pulled up and there goes the Fresh & Onlys hopping out of it. Part of me was a tad star struck (in a real slacker, unexcited way), but the other part of me had the excitement of an Ohio housewife readying herself to begin tossing her panties at Tom Jones.

I walked up to the car as they were all getting out and introduced myself to the lead singer, Tim. He was friendly as hell and apologetic for their error regarding the time of the show. We talked about a bunch of other shit too. He introduced me to Wymond and asked him to go and get me something. I wasn't sure what he said, but I was a little excited about it.

About ten minutes or so later, out comes Tim Cohen holding a 7" record. He walked over and handed it to me. We talked a little bit more and we agreed that I'll definitely be there when they come back to town in March or April. After a handshake we said our goodbyes.

Honestly, I've met a lot of folks in my day, but these guys are definitely top of the pile friendly. Unless they suddenly decide to switch their style to European techno, they'll always have a fan in me.

Theirspace