Saturday, October 31, 2009

Secret Messages # 537

It's unpleasant when you come to the realization that you wouldn't feel guilty for turning your back on those who take you for granted. However, it's strangely comfortable. Or so I would imagine.

Happy Halloween! Don't get arrested!

Friday, October 30, 2009

Cristina Rosenvinge - Frozen Pool

Click here for ghost meat stew

Oh, what's this? Well, it looks like Ohrobot is having an indie pop morning. Today I'd like you to give a listen to Ms. Cristina Rosenvinge and her album "Frozen Pool."

Originally released in 2001, this album can comfortably sit on your shelves alongside your Mazzy Star and your Camera Obscura records without drawing any attention to itself. That said, it's a wonderful album that received absolutely no attention from the planet. Hopefully today is the day that you become intrigued. She began her career as a musician with the Latin folk group "Cristina y los subterraneos" and as you can see, started a solo career later on.

If I could command that you play a particular track off of this album first, it would be Expensive shoes.

Play it. Play it now! I command you!

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Involved read: Eight arms.

When the octopus grabbed hold of Kenny's leg I knew he'd had it. I could see his skin turning blue and I'll never forget the look on his face when we were trying to pull him back in the boat; despair. There's no other way to describe it. His eyes went hollow. It was kind of like looking at one of those photos of a road that seems to go on forever, you know? Maybe he was giving the once in a lifetime chance to die look? He didn't even scream. All of the yelling was coming from Sarah and me. We never even got the chance to see the damn thing either! I thought we'd tear his arm off, the way we yanked him toward us, but it was obvious that he was a goner. When he finally went under his face hit the side of the boat and then he was suddenly not there anymore. Sarah went nuts! I couldn't even do anything about it because I couldn't move. I wasn't catatonic, but I just sat there with my mouth open trying to process what just happened. She collapsed and with a panicked tone she started telling me that we had to get back to land. I followed her instructions and took us back to the dock. We didn't speak the rest of the way. I stared straight ahead and she just kept staring into the black water.

Mickey & Ludella's Bedlam A - Go - Go

Click here for scooter lessons.

Ludella Black and Mickey Hampshire are two of England's most rockin' inhabitants. The former being an integral part of The Delmonas and Thee Headcoatees alongside Miss Holly Golightly before embarking on a solo career. Not much has changed except maybe that her solo work is a little more "focused."

The latter, Mickey Hampshire, is a founding member of Thee Milkshakes, Thee Headcoats, and The Masonics. He's proven over the years that real Rock N' Roll pumps through his veins in a major way. It's that Medway sound the kids go nutso for!

These two have teamed up on a whole bunch of stuff, but this my friends... this was Ludella's first record without her homegirls... word.

Monday, October 26, 2009

Videos of the week!

Sic Alps - A story over there

Fresh& Onlys

Suicidal Tendencies - Possessed to skate

Rose Melberg hates clouds

Click here to make "rain love"

This record is good. No... perfect. Yes, that's it. Perfect for those rainy days where you end up sitting home alone thinking about the one that got away or the one that left your heart hurting. It's a twee as possible due to the sparse instrumentation and her soft, dreamy vocals featured on it. For the most part it's just Rose and her guitar that gently weeps.

I purchased this directly from her a couple of years ago and she couldn't have been a sweeter person. I swooned, but not in a cartoonish way where my feet left the ground and my heart beat out of my chest. It was more of a head nod because sometimes I just prefer to be boring.

Anyway, she's got a new record out called Homemade Ships and if you like this one you should go out and BUY her latest. I say buy because she isn't rich and she has kids to take care of. Not that that is your problem, but if you get off on looking at hungry kids, heck... go for it!

Couldn't you just taste that yummy ass sarcasm?

Please enjoy "Cast away the clouds" by Rose Melberg.

Lou Reed and the Primitives 7"

Click here for walrus flatulence

Earlier in this blog I posted a Lou Reed 7" that was absolutely fantastic. Today is not going to be any different. This is some really jumpin' pre-Velevets stuff here. That said, it isn't ground breaking, but as always, it's cool to see what our heroes were doin'' before they became what they are today.

I ripped these from wax so you can dance in your shacks!

A side: The Ostrich
B side: Sneaky Pete

Whirlwind Heat "Color" 7" set

Click here for ladies coupons

For a group of guys without a guitarist, Whirlwind Heat do a fine job at creating a racket. Fronted by bass and an organ, the drums expectedly come crashing down and turn these songs into what could be compared to what punk rock aliens from the future galaxy might tap their zorps to.

Fuck it... they're not even called fingers in the future... I know? Right?

Anyway, I ripped this three color set from a trio of 45's that I've kept safe for many years.

Please enjoy "Orange" "Pink" and "Purple"

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Coachwhips time!

Click here for great nothings.

John Dwyer. To most people this is just an ordinary name. A name that could belong to a lawyer... a baseball player... or a school shooter. To them it is just a name, but to folks like me, it means a whole other thing.


John Dwyer is a prolific musician in the garage punk scene. His musical output is proving itself to be in competition with Billy Childish in terms of how many recordings can one man possibly release? It seems like every time you blink this man has already recorded, packaged, and released a new record. He is also a man that doesn't stay in one band for too long. Pink and Brown, Thee Oh Sees, The Hospitals... plus a few more that I can't recall right now. He keeps busy.

I remember when my ears first met him...

He was loud and obnoxious, but exciting at the same time. It was the split 7" with Trin- Tran. I bought it because I liked the cover. It had a guy hovering menacingly over his bowl of cereal while clenching silverware in his fists.

However, after a few plays I turned my back on his sound and sold it to the highest bidder. It wasn't until earlier this year that I visited his work again. Since then I've managed to purchase a lot of his stuff up to his current band. Most recently I was able to pick up the Double Death LP in all its glorious red and black vinyl goodness! That was actually yesterday.

I firmly believe that he is a crazed man. Though to be honest... I'm glad he isn't any other way.

Please enjoy "Hands on the controls" by Coachwhips.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Interview with Ben from Des Roar.

L-R: Ryan, Ben, Alan, Lyla

I should begin this by telling you that Ben and I have been friends for many years now. We've played music together and between the two of us, have probably drank more alcohol than a tour bus full of Billy Joels. I know this because I have absolutely no memory regarding any adventure we've been on. Well... there was that one time where he passed out and we buried him beneath: Two bicycles, a tree, assorted books, a few guitars, a frying pan, some rock n' roll record albums, a statue of a labrador, and a human girl who later would attempt a wheelie across his lifeless body. All in all, the man knows how to party. That's not to say that he isn't a hard worker. Des Roar, the NYC band with whom he sings and plays guitar for, have just completed their debut long player, Mad Things. Besides working on that, they've been playing gigs nonstop and breaking hearts across the map. It's a wonder how we actually had the time to get this interview done at all.

Oh Robot: Hey man, it's good to finally talk to you. Let's be fake professionals here and try to remain sober while we do this. Okay? Introduce yourself to the people and describe your sound.

Ben Wolcott: Hello there. My name is Benjamin Charles Wolcott. I play guitar and sing in a band called Des Roar. We play Rock N' Roll music. I enjoy Powers whiskey by the bottleful. How's that so far?

Oh Robot: We're off to a grand start here, but I don't think I want to be sober.

Ben Wolcott: I've already taken a swig. Fi-yah!

Oh Robot: See? We're already getting off track. Tell me about the record.

Ben Wolcott: Well, it's called Mad Things and the eleven songs on it will take you about thirty five minutes to hear them out. The whole process took us a while to finish, but we're all pretty happy with the end result. I think that when the time comes for the next record to be recorded, we'll have less of a headache because we now know what not to do.

Oh Robot: Who writes the songs?

Ben Wolcott: I do the majority of the writing, but at some point or another we all give our two cents. It's just trying to figure out what works and what doesn't fit. I just try to play as much as possible. When I'm playing a lot, the songs just seem to come together easier. After I get one finished off I'll usually record it with a friend and listen to it a bunch. From there I'll make revisions. Maybe add a part here or take out a part there. Then, practicing the shit out of it kind of finalizes the song in terms of arrangement and instrumentation.

Oh Robot: How long have you been playing music? What inspired you to do it versus becoming let's say... a tennis champ?

Ben Wolcott: I was a really young kid and my parents were in a bluegrass band called Heaven's Mountain Band. I used to watch them practice all of the time and I'd get to tag along during the festivals they'd play. Also, when I was nine I played the Alto sax in my elementary school school band. I'm not sure how good it was though. As far as inspiration goes, I don't think you can be a drunken tennis pro. Music has just always been my thing. Without it I'd have a lot of free time on my hands.

Oh Robot: You guys are spending a bunch of your own cash to release the album. Are you worried about it leaking and getting served up all over the blogosphere?

Ben Wolcott: Something like that is totally out of our control so I don't think about it much. It's bound to happen though. It's a double edged sword, you know? You want people to be excited and hear the music, but at the same time you want to be able to not have to work a day job and just focus on making more music. We hope people will want to buy the record.

Initial wheelie perseverance test.

Oh Robot: What are some of your favorite albums?

Ben Wolcott: I really adore the first three Ramones records and Transformer by Lou Reed. Besides that, a lot of Chuck Berry and a great deal of the Beach Boys.

Oh Robot: Yeah, Transformer is an awesome record. I've got to see if I can dig up the cover of Perfect Day that we did. You know what though? We were pretty tanked that day and I'm not certain we actually pressed the record button. What are your favorite songs to play live these days?

Ben Wolcott: King of Kuffs is probably my favorite song to play right now. Also, there's a new song we did called Watch your step love. That one's about a bar doorman. It's easily one of my faves.

Oh Robot: If you could hand pick a line up of bands to tour with who would it be?

Ben Wolcott: Oh man, I'd love to hit the road with our good friends Gringo Star. Those guys are incredible. The Reigning Sound would be awesome. Detroit Cobras... Black Rebel Motorcycle Club and last, but not least The Warlocks. I have a lot of admiration for them.

Oh Robot: Have you guys had that "moment" where you knew that people were starting to take notice to what you guys were doing musically?

Ben Wolcott: We've got friends all over. Just the other day I was walking to work through the Lower East Side and from out of a patrol car I can hear Baby you're too young blaring from inside of it. Fuckin' mad things, these cops man.

Oh Robot: Who's in the band?

Ben Wolcott: We've got the lovely Lyla Vander on drum and vox, my longtime friend Mr. Ryan Spoto on the bass and vox, and the wild man Alan O' Keeffe on guitar and vox as well.

Oh Robot: Do all of you sing on this record?

Ben Wolcott: Lyla and I are the two main mouths, but yeah, we all open our traps at some point or another.

Oh Robot: I'm starting to feel tipsy so in honor of that I'm going de-professionalize this interview. Answer quick... New York or Los Angeles?

Ben Wolcott: Definitely New York! I fucking love this city!

Oh Robot: Beatles or The Stones?

Ben Wolcott: I've got to go with John, Paul, Ringo, and George. Although, I do love both bands.

Oh Robot: Sausage or bacon?

Ben Wolcott: Again, another tough call, but I've got to say bacon. I could eat it all day long. I actually have a wallet that's made to look like strips of bacon. I wish they actually made bacon scented candles or bath soap. I would buy it in a heartbeat. In terms of my favorite style of food? I'm going to say Italian and Mexican.

Oh robot: Are you currently in any other bands besides Des Roar?

Ben Wolcott: Nothing formal. Although I do play music with people outside of the bands. I'm constantly trying to get my friends to let me sit in on their practices. Not necessarily because I want to be in their bands or anything, but because I just love playing their songs.

Oh Robot: What's in store for the future? Are you guys going to do some heavy touring to promote the record?

Ben Wolcott: We just want to travel and play more. Play all day and all night. We also have loads of new songs. Maybe we'll put out a forty five or just start thinking about our second album. As far as touring goes, we've been playing NYC pretty much non stop. We'll be hitting the West Coast soon. Also, we've got some shows coming up in DC, Philly, and Connecticut. We're basically going to plug in wherever someone will have us. Maybe a few spots where they won't have us as well. Challenges are good.

Oh Robot: I noticed that you didn't mention Charlotte, North Carolina. Are you still weirded out by that guy that pulled a shotgun on you?

Ben Wolcott: Shit, I forgot about that guy. Yeah, he pulled out a gun and aimed it at us because we had finished our set and it was time to leave. We played that show with a band called Elevator Action. Coincidentally, none of us were hurt during our visit. That guy was kind of dodgy.

Oh Robot: Alright man...I think I've accurately captured what I needed to here. Although, my female readers might want to know who the ladykiller of the group is?

Ben Wolcott: That would be Mr. Ryan Spoto. He is an actual lady killer.

Wheelie test successful. Ben still sleeping.

Clicking the above link will get you
"It's not over for me" by Des Roar.


Friday, October 16, 2009

Covert Operations or How failure is ever present.

I suppose tonight is as good as any night to let everybody know what I've been up to here in the Ohrobot manor. It's been a pretty quiet October. I celebrated my birthday on the seventh. Thirty Three years old... kids call me Sir and I couldn't be happier.

The trappings of childhood are as abundantly horrible as they truly are wonderful. It really evens the playing field when you can say that your first kiss is as oppositely akin to the way it felt the first time you were taking a "standing up" piss and all of a sudden a book bag was thrown over your head and you were beaten mercilessly and left to die on a cold, hard high school bathroom floor.

It's been a wild week. I'll start backwards.

Just yesterday I set my alarm for six a.m. When it went off I knew that if I didn't make an attempt to get off the couch, I'd greatly increase my chances of being late, which in turn, would disappoint my boss. I had already done it once this week. Truth be told, it might be among the worst possible feelings I could experience.

I just completed a three day training course with about twenty five Detectives. The class was being facilitated by a former detective, high ranking Navy official, and all around nice guy.

It was a multi departmental live training exercise where I, along with the twenty five detectives, were ordered to hit the busy Los Angeles streets in search of an opposing group of "bad guys" that were positioned to spot us, the hunters. Ask me what's funny? I'll tell you...

Out of the twenty five detectives, only a handful of them were detected by the enemy and photographed. The photographs were then blown up and shown to the class upon return.

Guess what?

Out of all those guys, yours truly was pegged as an undercover cop the most times. Meanwhile, the seasoned detectives only got "burned" a little when compared to the amount of men they had operating in the field.

Even the cops started telling me that I looked like a cop. The funniest part about that is that when I was about fifteen years younger and living in New York, I went to Harlem in search of a bit of weed and had a similar experience.

Once exiting the train, I found my target rather quickly. He was a young, black kid... probably about seventeen years old. Do you know what this little prick had the nerve to do when I approached him?

As a greeting, I said "Hey man, you got some pot?"

It was as earnest a question as possible and I was dressed in a way that would allow people who aren't straight arrows to hang around me if applicable.

He turned to look at me and said "Nah... I ain't got that for you."

Intrigued by his obvious butchery of the English language, I pressed on.

I then said "C'mon...I just want to get some pot."

His response however, greatly differentiated from the white flag waving tone of my question to him. He looked at me with sizzling eyes and said "You a cop! Leave me alone!"

Being that I'm not a sworn officer of the law, I tried to convince him otherwise, but he wasn't having any of that nonsense. I then did what came naturally... I began to follow him.

As he walked away, I could pick up that he sincerely thought he was going to end up in some bracelets if he had stopped to chat. He was tense, but I pressed on further...

How do you convince a stranger that you aren't going to tie him up and hand him to some guys in a black and white?

My opinion... you can't.

Anyway, My team didn't catch one guy today. I'm a little sad from that, but the most important part here is that we all had fun.

So yeah... there were like, three pictures of me in a row. Ouch. A few guys in the class said I looked exactly like a French criminal. Another guy said the same, only he chose Italy as my criminal birthplace.

I'll post the surveillance pictures as soon as I get then from the instructor.

Sunday, October 11, 2009


Today was a weird one. It was sort of like a good day, but it appeared that it was just wearing a "good day" disguise and it was really a terribly bad day. As I'm sitting here with it all behind me, having a cheap rum and Coke, I'm recalling a few of the things that happened to me...but today I'll share only one.

1. The Ham.

At my job it could be said that it's business as usual. I walk around for hours on end without eating or resting and constantly check my email. However, there are some occasions when I feel weak. When this happens I simply find something to eat. This actually sounds better on paper than in reality because the food that is available to me has the potential to be considered by some as unsafe to eat or simply put: Pink in the middle. It's not always bad, but maybe they need to improve their selection of poultry plants. The crap that's being delivered to my job would probably be better off still alive and making some old lady happy to own it as a pet. Yuck. In light of today's offering of bone-in chicken, which I have begun to affectionately refer to as "Chicken Boneyard" I decided that it would be in my best interests to sit down and have a plain ol' ham n' cheese sandwich to prevent an untimely starvation death. I gobbled it up rather quickly and before I was even done swallowing, I received an urgent radio call that instructed me to get somewhere quickly.

Off I went. It was basically a non-event and I wrapped it up swiftly. After that I walked around and spoke to a few guests. Here's where it gets bad...

Of course, people always want to tell you shit that you don't want to hear, like:

1. "You look tired." - Honestly, I hate that. Fuck you, oh rested looking dick. Some of us work hard.

2. "Gaining weight?" - No asshole, I'm a chameleon and this is what I do when danger lurks nearby. Fuck!

3. "Are you drunk?" - Really? Do you think I'd be drunk at noon? You do? me there.

You know what they don't tell you though? Most people, as people have proven, will not tell you when YOU HAVE A FUCKING PIECE OF HAM HANGING OFF YOUR MUSTACHE!!!

It was dangling there like a Christmas ornament. Thanks public at large. Here I am... walking around trying to protect you and there you are... snickering about the pig on my flavor saver.

*Ham not included in above pic.

Secret Messages # 468

I'm pretty sure that my heart lay dead in my chest tonight.

Saturday, October 3, 2009

Video of the Week!

Zee Avi - Bitterheart from naz on Vimeo.

I'm not sure if this is old news for you guys, but I've been sitting on it for a few months. Ms. Zee Avi is a young Malaysian singer songwriter who through the miraculous power of the internet, was discovered by Whites Stripes manager Ian Montone and Greenhornes/ Raconteurs drum beater Pat Keeler. I guess those might be some pretty good fans to have. I highly recommend buying her album when you're just feeling melancholy or at a specialty grocer purchasing a bag of quinoa and a fancy cheese.