Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Happy Holidays from Dirty Carl!

Remember: Don't drink and drive this New Year's Holiday. You run the risk of puking in your car and that smell lingers even after a few cleanings. You'll never get laid again, plus you won't be able to listen to my show. That's way worse than no below the belt wranglin'. isn't it?

Sunday, December 18, 2011

Dirty Carl Show Vol. # 14
Click here to warm those nuts.

It's almost Christmas time... a time where even the most dark hearted Satanists come together and exchange gifts, sit around the cauldron, and make sweety sweet love to corpses. Wait... what?

I actually don't remember what I was going to say so I'll improvise as best I can...

Aw, fuck it. Kim Jong died today. I like trains. Here's the latest addidtion to the Dirty Carl radio hour... # 14... it ain't for sissies or bitchy cunties. Really... what the fuck am I saying?

BE ADVISED: This show is great with whiskey!

1. Ty Segall - Cherry Red
2. Sic Alps - L'Mansion
3. Reigning Sound - Lyin' girl
4. Tyvek - 4312
5. Germs - Richie Dagger's crime
6. John Wesley Coleman - Come on cops
7. King Khan & BBQ - Pig pig
8. Last Year's Men - In my car
9. Miss Ludella Black - This heart is condemned
10. Moonhearts - I hate myself
11. Mummies - I'm down
12. Oblivians - Dearest darling
13. Pow Wows - Do the splash
14. Shannon & The Clams - Sleep talk
15. Strange Boys - Poem Party
16. Thee Oh Sees - Wrong idea
17. Tijuana Panthers - Don't shoot your guns
18. Traditional Fools - Rock N' Roll baby
19. Des Roar - Tunnel of love
20. Cramps - Save it
21. Coachwhips - Goodnight good buy

Think I'm kidding?

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Dirty Carl Show # 13: Halloween 2011

Click here for nonsensical German explanations

Hello folks, it's time for another round of my radio show.... The Dirty Carl Radio Hour!

This particular episode is a little bit longer than an hour, but I'm sure you won't mind one bit.

I've had a pretty rough October, but I'm looking to turn that around. Now, if only Highlyann would have any desire to recreate that one beautiful Thanksgiving we shared... I'd be game. Actually... no. It was a cool day though.

Here is what you're in for:

1. Dirty carl intro,

2. Agent Ribbons - Your love is the smallest doll

3. Ben Wolcott - Someday (Strokes cover)

4. The Oh Sees - If I stay too long

5. Spectrals - Bonus jam

6. Adam Green - What a waster

7. The Cardigans - Sabbath bloody sabbath

8. Demons Claws - It's over

7. White Fence - Growing faith

8. Girls - Lust for life

9. Strange Boys - Me and you

10. Camera Obscura - If looks could kill

11. Jesus and Mary Chain - Surfin' USA

12. Mastabeta - No hits

13. Cooley & Munson - Sightly Sue

14. Magic Kids - Candy

15. Des Roar - Paranoia

16. Fresh & Onlys - Arms advice

17. Karen Elson - The ghost who walks

18. Mikal Cronin - Is it alright

19. Tom Carlisle - The look of nothing

Oh yeah... boo!

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

Attention witches:

Your day is just around the corner.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Des Roar - The watchers

Click here to rid yourself of the nag.

The Detroit Cobras, Dan Sartain, Ty Segall, The Greenhornes.... all highly respected bands, agreed?

Gringo Starr, Doppelganger, Two Tears, Dead Sparrows... all bands you should know more about, agreed?

What does all of this name dropping aim to prove? Well, for one thing it proves that Des Roar has been quietly fluttering beneath the radar for quite some time touring constantly with these bands, but it has indeed been enough time for these NYC Rock N' Rollers to embed themselves within a scene so fickle it may dump you a minute after you ask it to the prom. Guess what? Des Roar have a whole bag of corsets to supply your little young frames with and nothing suffers because of it.

What we have here is a band that has made music from the standpoint that a glass of Powers whiskey atop a bar has. The glass of beautiful booze is looking out at the crowd and you know beyond the shadow of a doubt that it's making fun of you, but not in a mean spirited way. No dude... it just wants you to have a good time and it wants to get you laid. There is no difference between it and the music of Des Roar.
(Don't mind the Gorillaz-esque artowrk)

Like a tagged up locomotive this band rumbles down the track. Sure, they're not breaking any new ground, but they ain't no copy cats either. What we have here is a solid Rock N' Roll record from a gang of kids who've adopted the LES as their place to be for the past decade or so.

That's not to say that they've abandoned their West coast sunshine and surf roots... no way man. This entire record is equal parts sun, surf, and subway train. It's easily the soundtrack to fucking, fighting, drinking, and breaking up. In fact, I'd be surprised if some douche bag record company guy didn't make a slimy appearance at the next ten of their shows just trying to coerce them into signing the wrong type of deal where their tunes are lent to reality shows to give those show insta-cred, but Ben, Ryan, Lyla, and Alan know so much better. They know that money isn't king. They know that as customers of Rock N' Roll, they need to provide something a whole lot better than all the rest of the shit clogging up peoples Ipod's.

Folks, the Robot has NEVER given you a bad road to follow. I've covered this band in the past and have done so with no expectation of having people disagree. Hold on...


Enjoy The Watchers by Des Roar!

R.I.Y.L. Detroit Cobras, Jesus and Mary chain, The (old) Strokes, Ty Segall, and the like...

And don't forget to check Kloke Records here.
It's their first release and what a strong first release it is!

Thursday, August 11, 2011

Who is Dirty Carl? This is lust potion # 9
Click here for hobo cologne

Hey gang, it's been a while, but that don't mean we can't still steal a car and hang out, right? Cool... I didn't think you were that lame. A lot has happened since we last spoke, but I'm still alive and that's what matters most.

How's Rock n' Roll these days, huh? As far as I can tell it ain't too good with all this electronical bleep and bloop going around lately. Then there's all that moany, gothy, bloop bleep. Jesus, does anyone still play guitar with purpose anymore?

I swear, it it wasn't for San Francisco, garage rock would take that exit door it takes every couple of years. We don't want that. No sir.

Anyway, I've been busy sure, but I started doing a little radio show that I think some of you guys and gals will enjoy. It's called the Dirty Carl Show and I will be your host... Dirty Carl. I'm handsome, love dogs, and haven't had tail in a million years. Take me home to your momma!

Enjoy show # 9. Leave a comment.

1. King Lollipop - Cheeseburger and fries
2. Agent Ribbons - Chelsea, let's go join the circus
3. April March - Moto Shag
4. Jeffrey Novak - Queen of moods
5. Earth Girl Helen Brown - I wanna do it
6. Charles Manson - Never say never to always
7. John Wesley Coleman - Basketball
8. Exrays - Everything goes
9. Fresh & Onlys - Come dance with me
10. Personal and The Pizzas - I don't wanna be no personal pizza
11. White Fence - Growing faith
12. Ty Segall - I got stoned
13. Libertines - Seven deadly sins
14. Sonic Chicken Four - Cool song
15. Belle & Sebastian - Step into my office, baby
16. Cardigans - Plain parade
17. Dr. Dog - My old ways
18. Zombies - What more can I do
19. Camera Obscura - Eighties fan
20. Misty Morgan - Strange new world
21. Magic Kids - Hey boy
22. Trachtenburg Family Slideshow Players - Look at me
23. Morrissey - You were good in your time
24. Dirty Carl Break

Monday, February 28, 2011

So, that's where it went... shit!

I don't know about you, but I've had my share of bikes stolen from me. Now I know who did it. He's still likable and honestly, all he'd have to do is ask instead of walking around with those heavy bolt cutters.

Greg Cartwright and TGL.

Click here for more butter

Last year the ever prolific Greg Cartwright released a live album at a little bar in Milwaukee entitled Greg Cartwright live at the Circle A. While it didn't blow me away, it was still cool to hear him in such an intimate setting. The high point however is the crowd itself... he must have been pumped to have such a group of people sitting cross legged at his feet.

Anyway, this is the 7 inch that came with that album as a nice little bonus. It features three songs which are cool takes on early Compulsive Gamblers, Oblivians, and his solo tunes. He's backed by The Goodnight Loving who I am not a fan of, but can still admit that they did a fine job at backing a legend.

Brilliant... Colors
Click here for ladybug pecks.

It's the day after the Academy Awards and I'm tired. I worked security for the event and the whole day was full of self important bung holes who never cease to amaze you with their inflated sense of self. Oh, you are the assistant to Justin Timberlake? So? Ah, you do Suzanne Summers make up... I'm sorry for you for having such a shit job.

Anyway, the first thing I did when I woke up this morning was put this on and feel better about the world.

PS. This 7 inch was recorded by Ty Segall in San Francisco.

Monday, January 10, 2011

Well, well, well... there's a spark.

Hello loyal readers. I hope that everyone had a great Christmas and a safe and happy New Year! I can't say that I had either. In fact, my holidays were terrible and spent completely alone. Actually, I rang in the exact point it became 2011 in a women's restroom with two chicks who were passed out on the cold tile floor. One of them even had diarrhea! Good times, right? I didn't know them, but me and some other guys were kicking them out of the place. 5... 4... 3... 2... 1... HAPPY NEW YEARS!!!!!! *insert fart sound right abut here.

So, to update you all... my wife has officially separated from me. She will be taking my children across the country. My dogs will go too. I will end up living in a rented room above a strip club or something like that when she's through with me. How can I be so calm? Well, when I go to sleep at night I'll do it with a clear mind and an open heart. Or is that a broken heart? I'll get through it all because I didn't cause this, depression did.

That said, if you or someone you know suffers from it, the best thing you can do is get them help because you may lose them to it as I have.

Now, we're pretending to be be friends. It kills me every moment of the day because obviously we still live under the same roof. The silver lining of this is that I get to live with my children and I love them more than anything... except my wife, who is the top of the pyramid. I love her equally. I wish I had a genie or something that could help me out, but I don't. The sands are slipping through the hourglass and I can't stop it.

Am I single? Who knows, but I'm quite sure no lady is going to be interested in the wounded animal type, you know? I'm not really interested in seeing anyone anyway. I just want the wife back. Or do I really?

You all have been very patient with me while I've been sorting myself out so I'd like to do something nice for you, except I don't know exactly what. Let's just say I'm working on it.


Click this for an audio representation of how I feel about my life right now. Make sure your speakers are on for the proper effect.

Also, a good pal of mine named Tyler has started something up aimed at the reader types out there. Check it out right here you goddamned sissies!